Affect and Influence (Last Confessions)

Sep.30.09

There exists, in the fluidity of collected subconscious, a measure of synchronicity and patterning that comprises the very flow of conscious thought. That which entails our reality is affectable - plastic to the extent our neural networks are. Recently, days have passed seemingly as webs reminding that:
new beginnings do not exist without new endings.
real can not truly be understood in the absence of fake.
God is inescapably present to us, not just that we are present to God.


It is important to notice the patterns occuring dring transistional seasons.

- The posturing that traps one in cyclic perceptions of reality is the very same posture one seeks comfort in to preserve self-identities (especially those identities incongruent with reality).

- God finds us and is never absent from us. This becomes known to us when we're ready to look. Remember when you love say not "God is in my heart" but rather "I am in the heart of God".

- Many ideas that can be extrapolated to dichotomic extremes in theory are useful to help understand, but possibly dangerous to apply - life is process, and is more dynamic, changing, influential and influenced than can be found in the "black half" or "white half" of any duality.

- Nurturance - maternity - security seeking - lonliness avoiding - affection hunger - sympathy and care are all constants of a Servant's personhood... Denying that these exist in oneself, or denying that accepting this embeds a deeper humility that allows one to serve God, can be dangerous and futile.

- The shift from an active observer of one's own life to the active participation/interaction with life itself entitles one to a great power & results from conscious effort for progress... thus this also entails and no less requires great responsibility.

- A Believer, in their very service of believing, volunteers a level of participation that empowers, enlightens, and influences. For a Servant to serve (and indeed be of service) he must be empowered, enlightened, and influential.

- Mind the company you keep - do not be quick to presume that the very reason of your relationship is knowable in the present or that knowing it is ever meant to be... Mind what you say out of love to those in your company - the selfish satisfaction of being the best you can be at every oppourtunity for honesty may not result in the effects you intend, and can be recieved as opposite to whatever goodness you might've intended.

Be big enough a person to be:
Silent until you know HOW you're being heard.
Absent until you understand the extent your presence affects.
Humble so that those who have something you can learn from can have the chance to teach it to you.
Honest to yourself, about yourself, unconditionally.